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Name: MaoMao Aka MaoMaoster
Age: 21
School: Temasek Poly
Hates: BackStabbers
Likes: Loyalty,Friends,Basketball,Slacking,
Crapping
Someone who tends to be very determined which he set his goals.
Someone who like to bring smile and laughter to people around him.
Someone who will not tolerate insults to his loved ones.

Well.... came back from 438 at 11 plus ... den here i am to blog .. though quite late ... haha ... was customizing my blog ..... added a box for ppl to comment .... hehe ... BUT ... i cannot seem to see the box myself while others can .... wtf ?? smlj ? nvm ... tml see how bah ....

well ... jus now went 438 and play basketball.... on my way to meet hui,kang and hong .... i told myself have to be serious in any match i play .... in the bus .... i keep telling myself... have to be serious ... so i can improve .... cannot take thing lightly .... den reach hong the house de bus stop le ... i miss call ah hui ... coz meeting them at 6pm ... but i reach there 1 min eariler ... *so ? den wait for them till about 6.10 i think ... nt sure ... while waiting .. i saw my ITE fren ... han wei ... ahha ... he juz got his car license ... *congratz ... ^.^ *sigh ... i still haven pass my advance theory ... sianz sia .. come to think of that ... i failed 2 times leh .... wtf sia .... izzit becoz i never got for the e-trial ... ??? how can that be ?? no link leh .... T.T

den reach 438 .... play a 4 v 4 match against some people there .... den we won ... but i never do much thing ... just pass the ball to them and they score .... coz ... i am too weak to attack ... only can shoot ... but also cannot score .... *haix ... y like that ?? after that ... 438 de ppl lai le .... den we play 4 v 4 wif them ... but i felt scared coz there got 1 person very fit and strong ... they called him "tanker" wa ... everytime i play wif him .... i will siam ... coz i dun wan to get hurt ... i know ... if ah hui , kang , hong or boon sees this ... they will surely say ... "if u keep on doing this .. how to improve ..?? " but ... i am jus scared .... i also dunno y .. maybe i feel inferior compare to him ... or those who are much stronger than me ... i jus feel inferior ... haix ...T.T

but we won the 1st match against them .. thanks to ah hui for his excellent attacking inside , hong accurate shooting and kang's rebound .... well ... compared to them ... i am just an "extra"
i know in my heart ... if boon was there or zhan hong .... i will not be the one who is in their team ... i know myself ... who will wan a person who do not contribute in a team or even become a burden to them .... it reminds me of an anime called "dear boys" in 1 of the episode ... there is a part when 1 guy called Miura heard other ppl saying that he and Ishii is a burden to Aikawa ... well .... guess i am also a burden to them ... jus that they dun show it bah ... T.T

well ... guess up to here ... u guys must be telling me ... den u still play basketball for wad .... might as well quit .. giv up ... well .... there is a point of time when i really wan to giv up ... but ... somewhere in my heart stop me for doing so .... believe it or nt ... well ... den on the bus on our way hm ... ah hui hesitate to ask me this important question .... although maybe nt important to them ... or serious to them ... but to me it is .... he asked "Eugene ... Do u really wan to improve ?" when he ask me this ... hong was there saying .. that i will become sad or maybe cry when i heard this ... but seriously ... i really do feel sad and depair when ah hui ask this question .... i do nt blame him for asking him ... or even question him ... coz ... me myself cannot even answer .... but i really DO wan to improve ... but i juz can't seems to be doing that .... everytime i try to improve ... there will be jus some obstacle .. that is hindering me from it ... although u all might not see it ... or maybe u all might be thinking that i am talking crap here ... but ... i just feel that something is hindering me from doing it ... it maybe my mentality ... or my physical body .... >.<

well ... this part might to offending or it may mean nth to those who i am going to mention ... but it is meaningful and important to me coz it has been kept inside my heart for very long ... well here goes ...
Kang ... seriously .... every words u tell me and everything that u teach me .... i really bear that in mind ... and i really try to improve myself ... although everytime u see me is still the same ... still so buay kan ... any maybe u have given up on me... but i do not blame u ... is my fault ... i blame no one but myself .... but i still thank you for the advice u have given me ...
Ah hui ... although i might not show it.. but i really admire u ... the way u can dribble the ball .... the courage to lay-up even u r small size ... and the speed .... that u have shown ... it really drives me to do better ... to improve myself .... to push myself .... although i do not show it ....and that i thank you for it ...
Hong ... we have been frens since sec 1 .... and may be u may not notice ... i really appreciate u as my fren ... and i really treasure it .... although sometimes i may piss u off becoz of my attitude or actions ... i hereby apologise .... and i mean it ... i will try to change ... *back to basketball ... u may be cork sometimes when we play basketball ... and wanting to be wif the same team wif kang ... i do not blame u .. coz i take it as a training ..... and try to improve myself .... although sometimes u feel farked up during matches when u are in a same team wif me ... i do not blame u ... coz i know i will be a burden to u .... but i really tried my best to do well ... although i may nt show ... i really feel lousy when some simple things i do like shooting a free throw and missed ... and when i am open can't even score a single point ... when u all trust me in doing that particular shot .... i really thank you for that trust .... but i do not cherish it .... and some advice u have given me ... i really appreciate that ... i thank you for that ....
Boon ... u have improved alot since sec sch .... the way u play basketball now and treat basketball is different ... u really have the passion to do well in basketball .... n that i really envy u .... u also got the height and the size to do well in ur specified position ... sometimes it really makes me wan to grow as tall as u ... and help to take rebounds .... but i know ... thats impossible for me now .... and the words and encouragement u given in during and after matches really helps alot .... it really gives me hope and makes me feel better .... thank you for that ... but i know i am still a burden to u ... i am sorry for that ...
Chi ... u have been my best fren since sec 3 .. coz sec 1 and 2 we were nt close ... till now ... i really appreciate that .... we can so called been thru "thick n thin" together ... from the day when i 1st introduced u basketball and the things we do in sec sch .... although sometimes u may have thought that i am close to u becoz of ur money .... but i swear to god ... that is nt true ... i really take u as a fren ... and u r indeed my true fren ... ^.^ *back to basketball ... chi ... u have really improved a alot since the day i introduced u to this thing called basketball ... from a person who only holds the ball when passed to ... till now ... being able to lay-up n do accurate shots ... it really saddens me ... coz ... u n the rest have been improving since the day u all play basketball while me ... still at the same standard ... still as lousy as b4 ... haix ... T.T and sometime i may giv farked up attitude when playing as a team wif u ... like not defending properly ... i am really sry .... its nt that i dun like to be the same team wif u but ... its just that i really sux at defending ... although sometimes i may play better when i am wif hong they all ... but ... i am still lousy ... compared to them ... or shall i say ... the lousiest among u all ... but i still thank you for the advice and tips u have given me in basketball .... i really appreciate that ... thanks ^.^

well ... although some ppl i have not mention above ... its nt that u are nt impt to me or have not changed my life .... well in my heart ... i really cherish u all ... and i really thanks those who have made me live to the fullest ... and those who have listen to my thoughts ... its u who have made me think that .... other than family members .... there are others who have played a part in my life and have change my life since the day i know them ... thanks ^.^

well ... think i blog too much le .... sorry for the long post .. but i have really spoke out wad that as kept in my heart a long time .... i feel relieved now ... and i apologise those who i may hav offended in my post .... i am sorry ... =x

Labels: Feeling down and despair .... hopeless boy =x